Easter Morning Awakening to Love
Wow, Easter morning, the time of awakening according to many of the religions of the world. Funny how it has coincided with my own awakening to and of more of my connecting to source, who not only made me in the perfect form to be me, but also sent me here with the perfect way to always connect back to it for guidance (God-U-&-I-Dance).
An awareness and confirmation I have been on the trail of for years, just finally getting more grounded in my understandings of the many situations I have created, faced, gone through, survived to either repeat, because I kept seeing the problem as: from out there, caused by other person, places or things. Or changed by taking responsibility to either move, adapt, or improvise to a better place or condition. Still traveling this desire, dream, understanding, or memory that has always coaxed me forward to come this way, left here, hard right, stop, listen, now feel the calling.
On a never ending quest to soothe this strong, powerful feeling of peace, love, completeness for or toward an instinctive, intuitive idea that I now understands resides inside every one of us, so begging to be noticed, recognized and lived of being in love. Love with the moment, with another, with an idea, with any number of things which allows us to be truly in love with ourselves…right…now! Now being the key to everlasting peace, because now is always changing, it is the most amazing word I have come across and finally understand. It is always a present moment that disappears, to become anew “now” the moment one utters, thinks, or is aware of it.
The last few weeks has been an unearthing, digging, delving, sorting, listening, watching, truly participating in every aware second of “now” I have paid attention to. In so doing this have been guided down a trail of truly understanding my life, my role, my intuition, my instincts, my Self. There has been an itching, stretching, yawning, expanding in almost every corner of my body. As I get a feeling to look here, try this, touch that, read this, listen to this one, soak this in, hear how that feels, and when it even begins to feel just the slightest out of tune with me. Stop, walk away, listen to the strongest most powerful tool at my constant disposal…my own body. All of these wonderful cells, constantly dividing, replicating, changing and becoming more of me.
I had been sent a link to listen to several different awakening gurus (for lack of a better word) to non-subscribers as a gift until the end of Passover from Shifra@TheGateOfUnity.com. Since it was a freebie, gift, offer that arrived while I have a long 3 day weekend, no bus driving on Good Friday, no clients on Easter. I was excited to find there were two audio’s from Jennifer Hough whom I have only recently listened to and gotten so much wonderful energy release from. So of course listened to one of hers first, to find myself reaching a new resonating understanding within myself. Causing me to then select two other speakers, each with a link to a free bigger taste of their teachings, with a buzzing going on in the back of my head, to find both were blind alleys, their alluding to the free sample, after I commit financially. Then in fixing supper, have my youngest inform me of the latest broken dish being my fault for choosing something that did not own up to his standards of handling things. I flew into this festering, how dare he criticize how I choose to spend money I earned. Which then exploded into this loud conversation, then dialogue that became a talk, as a whole lot of loose, lost, old, misunderstood communications came out into the open, to be seen in the bigger perspective of problems from before right “now” we had both been caring around, shoving, using, and manipulating each other with.
The whole way through the conversation I kept listening to my body, my cells, myself, as I felt first the anger, then the frustration, the rage, denial, fears, acceptance, finally understanding. At how long I have been putting out the fires of others. This big Ahh Ha, caught me front and center, I have been so trained in it not being okay to be me, in any way shape or form that another made even the slightest hint of “no not that” I would become the magical EMT to the rescue to fix, repair or replace whatever to fit in, be okay.
This morning I woke up in love…with my body. Who has so awesomely been there for me through everything. Always loving me, always doing the best for me, always waiting on me, breathing, living, surviving, thriving. Even when I was off in my mind doing other things, It has always held my spirit lovingly in its embrace of my life! Thank you body, you are magnificent, I pledge to listen to you better, more, and treat you like the wonderful loving partner you have always been to me!