Still…Cleaning and Waiting
Woke up early even after I so wanted to just sleep in late. Got up, dressed, went and fed, to come in to the biscuits timer going off on the oven. Pulled them out, all the while feeling and noticing the sand under my bare feet all across the kitchen floor, making a mental note of each particular out of place or dirty area in need of this Sunday’s cleaning, after I finished my breakfast. Fixed myself three biscuits saturated in strawberry preserves to munch on while I was perusing my emails, my mind in a whirl of thoughts from yesterday’s movie choice which disappointed, followed by the purchase of a better weed eater, that also allows for other various attachments to accomplish the many other jobs waiting back at home. Standing in line to check out as my phone suddenly goes off, a friend passing my house at the exact time my horses have found where my youngest had forgotten to secure two gates. She and some men have them corralled two doors over and wanted me to know.
I thank her profusely, checking out quickly the whole time my son exclaiming it was not his fault. I just drive home, pull in to grab some halters, “we” take quick note on the placement of his tools next to the widely swinging gate. We then drive over in amazing apology filled air, to quickly halter and with the aide of the nice young men get the wandering marauders all safely home again.
I offer to pay the two men, who politely refuse, and we start talking horses, as the one handling two of mine was so amazed at how well-mannered they were, wanting to know what exactly is it I do. I listen to myself describe what I do in an entirely new way, totally fascinated when the words “I coach others to find their own unique signature and style.” He laughs and says he has to get his wife here to learn some of this stuff, she needs to find herself, her confidence, her passion to do something.
I laugh and tell him life is all about digging through the layers of conversations, instructions, opinions, and beliefs given to us by well meaning and loving individuals, to then find what parts truly work for us to be happy just being us. Not just for a moment or two, but to be able to find the good in just about any situation, always looking for a solution not just sitting staring at the problem. They took my card, I thanked them again, and as they drove away, my youngest commented…”You know mom, things always do work out for you.”
Causing me to pause now in my re-living of the last 24 hours, with a clean house, groceries (we went back for after the mad dash home). The house edged, the lawnmower now with oil and gas drained, turned upside down, still impossible for me to drill a hole into the broken bolt to use the ease out for. My oldest the mechanic called to finish that chore, awaiting a change I feel coming, as I allow the horses to graze the yard to further my diminishing of places for mosquitoes to hide and then feast upon us. My mind searching for the quiet, fulfilling connection to source for some reason today in a deeper, more satisfying fashion.
I’m tired, I have accomplished so much this week, as things keep working out….yet even though I keep feeling I am getting bigger pieces of the puzzle put together, I have the border and edges, with several areas filled in. It’s just this niggling in the back of my head, there is something, right there, I can sense it, feel it, know and recognize it. Just exactly what… I’m not sure just time to go do something else, get my mind off of it. Allow “it” to just show itself when it is the right time. Hmmm…. “.”!